Archive for the ‘Motivation’ Tag

The best is yet to come

Here we are folks, day 30. Let me start with a warning to my readers (both of you, you know who you are). If you’re looking to be uplifted and encouraged this morning drag your mouse to the top o the screen in your google tool bar type in these two words “Joel Osteen“.

Good Ole’ Joel
I’m quite certain that at this very moment he’s teaching a fabulous message about joy and overcoming just for you! Heck, I’ll probably make my way over to his blog after I’m done pitching a little toddler fit over here on mine.  Then I’ll probably have to put on my big girl panties and come back here to start a new post in which I’ll apologize for complaining. Then I’ll talk about how each day is a gift from God and we must not let the devil steal even a second of our joy.  If you’d rather here me talk about that then I suggest you skip this post and come back later after I’ve been schooled by good ole’ Joel cause right now I’m ticked and I’m lettin’ loose!

I guess you’ve figured out that I am not quite myself today. While the old me would have apologized for that, the new me is going to lovingly and firmly say “DEAL WITH IT”(I sure as heck am trying to). It’s okay sometimes to feel crappy, especially when crappy things happen. Our society is so hell-bent on being “good” and “okay” all of the time that it makes me sick.  No matter the circumstances, we are expected over and over to smile, nod and say “fine, you?” when some asks how we’re doing.  Well ya know what? Sometimes things aren’t “fine” and that should be allowed every once in a while don’t ya think? Sometimes, someone asks how I’m doing and I want to just blurt out “pretty crappy actually, my dog just died, my 2-year-old pitched a raging fit in Everman’s while I was trying to pick up my vitamins and I’m not sure if I’ll make my mortgage payment this month. But, I’m trusting God and hanging in there. How bout you?”

You know what though? Most people don’t want to be bothered with the details of someone elses life. When they ask how you are they want a simple exchange of pleasantries and nothing more. That’s why I’m so grateful to serve a God who wants to know me intimately.  He cares that my heart broke this morning when I woke up to let my dog out and he wasn’t there. He cares that my son and I both left the health food store in tears the other day after a complete meltdown and he desire is to bring  us financial provisions we are faithful with the finances that he provides.  Our Lord Jesus Christ cares about our comings and goings, numbers our steps and promises to provide for those who love him.  Mathew 7:7-11 assures us of that. Just one of the reasons I’m glad to serve a loving, caring and mighty God.

Back to the whole “ending the fast portion of this blog.  I thought I’d have all of these insights on day 30. I pictured day 30 something like this…wake up- feel great, get on the scale-feel great some more, enjoy my coffee-while feeling great, go to the gym-followed by more feeling great, I think we all see where this is headed. I hate to burst your bubble guys, I hope you didn’t expect for me to get on here today and tell you that if you just followed the same plan I did you’d suddenly be closer to God, thinner, happier and an all around better person. Sometimes things don’t go as planned.  Actually, my day has gone more like this…wake up-feel anxious, miss my puppy-feel depressed, get on the scale-feel defeated, go to the gym-finish yoga feeling good, start the spin class-leave in tears within 15 min. and head home worn out upset and tapped out.  Not exactly how I’d hoped this day would go but those are the cold hard facts and I’m into being “real” so there it is.

So I guess what I’m trying to say here is that sometimes life doesn’t go as planned. Sometimes you stub your toe getting out of bed and it all goes downhill from there.   Our days don’t have to be filled with rainbows and butterflies to be worth living.  Sometimes it takes being knocked down a few times in our own strength in order to stretch our hand toward a mighty God and ask him to help us back up.  We must look beyond our selves and our vain attempts to “be better people” and just lay prostrate in the throne room of God, cry at his feet a while and beg him to tear us apart piece by piece and put us back together according to his plan for our lives.

It’s easier said than done, but I think I may finally be at that point. It’s hard though, I’ve had times where I really thought I had given something fully to God, I’d pray, cry, beg him to take it, think I had already given it to him months before and not understand why I was still struggling with the same issues again and again. Then one morning God gave me a vision.  It was He and I sitting across from one another on the concrete. I had a big red ball in my hand and were bouncing it back and forth.  I’d bounce the ball his way and say “okay, God it’s yours, I can’t do it my own strength, take it please”. But always, just before he had a full grasp on the ball I’d get scared, pull back and mumble some nonsense about it being “my ball”.  That was powerful to me, he showed me that as much as I wanted his help I didn’t truly trust him with “my ball” yet.  How crazy does that sound? The God of the Universe isn’t responsible or capable enough to care for “my ball” but I am? Nonsense! My plan obviously isn’t working out all too well so why not let the one who created me do what he does best and re-create me in his image rather than the image this fading world is shoving me into?

By the way, I have gotten some really amazing revelations during this time of fasting and praying and plan to share them soon but today just wasn’t that day. God will tell me when and I’ll jump on the opportunity to glorify him for all he’s done in our lives during this time of drawing near. Until then, this is the verse I’m hanging onto with all my might today is Deut 2:3 You’ve circled this mountain long enough, now turn and go North!

My homeland, Anchorage AK

Questions for response and ponder

1. What dead ends have you come to over and over and how to you plan to approach them differently this time?

2. What mountain have you circled for way too long and have you decided to turn north rather than continuing to wear a trench around its base?

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Posted 07/13/2011 by spinandbareit in Life, Philosophy, Religion

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